When I don’t listen to my ‘Little Voice’ … I regret it!

Intuition:

1. The state of being aware of or knowing something without having to discover or perceive it, or the ability to do this.

2. Something known or believed instinctively, without actual evidence for it.

3. Immediate knowledge of something.

I know it may sound crazy but I have a ‘little voice’ in my head that attempts to guide me. When I choose to ignore it, I usually live to regret it…

I got a call from a new client. Something had come up with Jan’s pet sitter, and she couldn’t stay with the dogs during her upcoming trip. Jan was planning on leaving in four days, but would have to cancel if I couldn’t sit with them. I happened to be free for the three nights she needed me. So, I took pity on her and I said yes… Even though she lives outside of my pet sitting area, and my ‘little voice’ was yelling, “No, don’t do it!” We set up a consultation. Then she mentioned her elderly, but very independent, mother would be there too… My ‘little voice’ was screaming by then.

During our consultation, I learned that one of her dogs wasn’t housetrained. She had to be walked every four hours, or she’d go in the house. Jan wanted me to do overnights, plus three extra visits, to walk the dogs. At that point, I wished I’d listened to my ‘little voice!’ I really didn’t have time, nor did I want to drive that far three times a day. But I had already said I would do the job. We decided I would arrive at 11 a.m. and 3 p.m. to walk the dogs (a 30 minute visit). Then return at 6 p.m. and stay overnight. I met Jan’s mother, and Kate was very pleasant, but obviously confused. Jan mentioned she tended to get up about three in the morning, and putter around. But she’s very quiet, and won’t disturb me… Right.

I quickly realized that Kate needed much more care than the dogs. She was able to get around fairly well, but like any 86 year old person, she wasn’t all that sure footed. While she didn’t need help with doing physical things; she was, in my opinion, showing signs of Alzheimer’s. I saw Kate doing many things my mother had done when she started getting ill… Kate would repeatedly ask the same questions, or tell me the same things. She had problems communicating, because she couldn’t remember words, and then she’d get frustrated with herself and me when I didn’t understand. Kate would lose something, and become frantic when she couldn’t find it, often it would be right in front of her.

I could tell Kate wasn’t keen on having me come in just to walk the dogs, and then leave. She wanted/needed me to stay there! Like my mom, she was too proud to say she needed help, and she’s afraid to be alone. When I would tell Kate I had to leave, a look of fear and anxiety would cross her face, as would relief when I returned. I often saw the same expressions on Mom’s face too. In the middle of a task, Kate would forget what she was doing. It was also potentially dangerous; for instance, she could forget she was heating water for tea and start a fire. I also worried she might fall and seriously injure herself. I had visions of coming back to find her writhing in pain on the cold, tile floor. So I ended up spending as much time with Kate as I possibly could, which was considerably more time than I got paid for… But, I did not want anything to happen to Kate on my watch. It also occurred to me that I wasn’t at all sure what my liabilities would be if something did happen. I’m insured for providing pet care, not sure about elderly people.

Like mom, Kate would go to bed early, then get up in the middle of the night and wander around the house for the rest of the night. Kate would come into the room where I was sleeping, and stare at me. When I opened my eyes, she’d ask me a series of questions: Are you warm enough? Do you need another blanket? Do you want something to drink? Are you hungry? A little later, she’d be back doing it all over again.

In so many ways, Kate reminded me of my mother, they looked very much alike. Turns out, like mom, Kate had been a nurse and a very independent woman, especially for their time. Also, like mom, Kate is very spiritual, although in a totally different way. Because she did remind me so much of my beloved and very loving mother, I really liked Kate. However, she also reminded me of the most emotionally painful time in my life, watching my mother slowly and literally lose her mind. I like to remember mom before Alzheimer’s, when she was a vibrant, intelligent, active, and truly independent woman. Being with Kate, dredged up unhappy memories I had pushed out of my mind… like the first time my mom didn’t remember me.

It was such a relief when Jan returned, and the job was over. It was emotionally draining, and exhausting… I’m too old to go three nights without sleeping, LOL.

It was also a lesson to always listen to my “little voice!”

Is it Tricks or Treats for the Pets?

For many people, Halloween is a treat. We like dressing up, and seeing others in their costumes. We enjoy the sights and activity of kids ‘trick or treating.’ We might host, or attend a party(s), go to a carnival, etc. We sometimes decorate our homes for the holiday. It’s also the time when we tend to start having candy and other yummy treats around. For me, it’s the beginning of the eating season. LOL.

For many pets, Halloween is more Tricks than Treats. Animals don’t really get costumes. When we are masked, or wearing something that alters our silhouette, even family members can be extremely frightening to some dogs and cats. If you’re going to wear a costume your pets might find even remotely scary, try letting them watch you put it on in, and walk around in it a few times… before Halloween. Otherwise, don’t be surprised if your dog barks at you, or your cat runs away, when you suddenly appear as a monster, or whatever.

Your pets might not mind seeing you in your costume. However, they might not feel the same about strangers showing up at the front door wearing them… and yelling too! A few pets could care less about a bunch of silly humans running around in costumes, and making a lot of noise. They’re the party animals, and they’ll just hang out and enjoy the action. Many dogs and cats are not party animals, and they have been known to freak out and run away when confronted with several scary creatures at their front door. Often escaping through the open front door, and past those same scary creatures... Pets who run away are likely to be returned more quickly if they're wearing a properly fitting collar, with ID tags. Of course, some dogs might try to defend themselves from the scary creatures by growling, snapping, and then resorting to biting. They’re not party animals.

If your pets aren’t party animals, it’s a good idea to keep them in a room, or their crate, far away from the front door or party. Give your dog a nice raw meaty bone, well-stuffed Kong, bully stick, etc. to keep him occupied; the chewing might help to calm him too. Give your cats a “safe place” to hide from the noise: inside a closet, box, cat home, under a bed, etc. Close the windows and drapes, to cut down on outside noises, and so your pets can’t see people walking around outside. Turn on a radio, TV, or play Canine Lullabies to help mask the sounds from outside of the room. If your dog barks at the doorbell, put tape over it to prevent people from ringing it; and be prepared to open the door when people arrive, so they don’t have to knock. If you’re having people over, put a sign on the door, telling people to not enter the “pet’s room.” Also, make sure to tell people too, sometimes we don’t always read signs.

For their safety, it’s a good idea to keep pets inside around Halloween. Sadly, cats and dogs have been stolen, poisoned, injured, and killed, during Halloween pranks, and for other sadistic reasons.

Sometimes we dress our pets up for Halloween. If you decide to dress your pet up for Halloween, don’t leave him unattended while wearing his costume. Your pet might decide to ‘take off’ the costume by chewing through it and eating parts of it. If it has long, flowing pieces, it could get hung up, and trap or strangle him.

Decorating for Halloween is fun too. Decorate with your pets in mind. Naturally your pets will be interested in all the new things around the house. Sometimes sniffing can lead to chewing, and perhaps ingesting foreign objects. Things that dangle can be a great temptation for cats, puppies, and some dogs to play with, and perhaps try to eat. Jack o Lanterns are a tradition, but be careful where you put them. Many dogs and cats like pumpkin and, in proper quantities, it’s very good for them; but too much of a good thing is still too much. Eating too much pumpkin can cause diarrhea.

Be very careful when using candles! Candles add ambience, and a Jack o Lantern isn’t complete without one, but an inquisitive pet can burn himself, or knock one over and start a fire. If you have nosey pets, or cats that get up onto tables, counters, etc., like mine do, you might want to use flameless candles. Never leave burning candles unattended, even if you don’t have pets!

And then, there are our treats… Yum! I LOVE CHOCOLATE!!! When I buy candy, Halloween or not, I buy something that’s covered with chocolate, and has nuts. Dogs tend to love chocolate too, but it can make them very ill, in fact it can kill them. It’s best pets never develop a taste for it, so DO NOT EVER LET YOUR DOG EAT CHOCOLATE!

Even without chocolate, some “people treats” can be too sweet, salty, or rich for pets to metabolize well, if at all. But they taste good, so some pets will eat as much as they can get. Don’t tempt your pets by leaving candy, and other treats, where they can reach them. It doesn’t take long for some dogs to eat several pieces of those mini-candies, often along with big pieces of the wrappers.

Here’s wishing you a Happy Halloween! Have fun, and remember to make it safe and stress free for your pets too.

What NOT to Take into a Dog Park… Part Three

“A dog park is like a cocktail party, where you don't know anyone and everyone is drunk. You could have fun, but it could be a disaster.” Trish King.

In an earlier blog, called My Three Rules For Dog Park Safety, I mentioned I always observe what’s happening inside a dog park before I take my dog, and/or clients, into one. I mentioned that I check out what the people are doing. Are they watching their dogs, or are they doing other things like, chatting, reading, playing video games, talking on the phone, etc? Too often people seem to be doing everything… except watching their dog(s). So, I’d like to ask people not to bring distractions into a dog park. When you’re reading, texting, talking on the phone, playing video games, or chatting with other dog owners, you might not be paying a lot attention to your dog.

It’s up to us, as pet parents and guardians, to watch, manage, and protect our dogs, at all times. That’s especially true of when they are with a number of dogs, who really they don’t know each other, running around loose together, i.e., a dog park. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure… in other words: it’s better to prevent a dogfight, than to have to deal with the aftermath of one.

Some dogs, like some people, are socially inept. While they may be friendly and want to play, some dogs can be too pushy and “in your face” for another dog’s comfort. The “pushy” dog either doesn’t understand, or ignores the warning signals the “uncomfortable” dog is sending to back off. Even the nicest of us will push back when we are pushed too far; and so will our sweetest, most friendly, dogs. Other dogs are very fearful of strange dogs, and they’ve learned that the best defense is a good offense. So they often overreact, and sometimes lash out, to even minimal interest in them. A little tiff can quickly become a big fight!

I have spent a lot of time in dog parks and I’ve seen too many dogfights. The vast majority were not serious, but they’re always highly emotional for all us animals. If we, as dog parents/guardians, do our job and pay attention, we can intercede, distract, or remove our dog before a fight gets started.

Dogs poop in dog parks, and often more than once. Sadly, there are groups in many communities who want to eliminate, not only off leash dog parks, but also the ability for dogs to go to any park, even on leash… PERIOD. One of their arguments against dogs in parks, is that dogs are a health risk, especially to children. That’s because dogs poop everywhere, and people don’t always pick up after them. Unfortunately, this is all too often true.

It is every dog owner’s responsibility to pick up after his or her dogs… Every single time!! If you’re not watching your dog, because you’re reading a book, playing a game, talking on the phone, etc., you won’t notice when they poop. And then, you won’t be able to clean it up. It might not seem like a big deal to leave one poop behind, but you are giving those anti-dog/dog park groups fuel for their cause to keep all dogs out of all parks. Besides, it’s just plain common courtesy to always pick up after your dog!

Dog parks aren’t our libraries, offices, or social scenes. They’re a place for dogs to run, play, and have fun. However, like in any playground, sometimes feelings get hurt, and quarrels get started. Also, like in any playground, we adults need to be aware enough to keep everyone under threshold and under control. If we all do our part, by following the rules of the parks, picking up after our dogs, and keeping an eye on them to prevent unhappy incidents, we’ll all have a better and happier dog park experience.

What NOT to Take into a Dog Park… Part Two

“A dog park is like a cocktail party, where you don't know anyone and everyone is drunk. You could have fun, but it could be a disaster.” Trish King.

“Young children should never be in an off leash dog park; but if they are they should always be on leash!” Me.

There are so few places where dogs get to run around, play, socialize, and just be dogs… They’re called Dog Parks and they’re for dogs, not kids! Don’t get me wrong, I love children, which is why I think no one under ten should be allowed to enter a dog park. Does that sound harsh, too bad; a dog park can be a dangerous place for children!

I once saw a little girl, about four, get bowled over by a couple large dogs. It was an accident; the dogs were just playing dog games in a dog park. However, the girl hit her head on the edge of a concrete bench, cut her scalp, and it bled a lot. Luckily, it looked worse than it was, and she was fine after a stitch. However her head hit that bench very hard, and it could have been so much worse!!!

Then there was the boy, about six, who would run up to a dog, grab his head, pull the dog’s face into his, hold on tight, and stare into the dogs eyes. Then he’d move on to the next one and do it again. OMG, It was a dog park disaster waiting to happen, and I felt compelled to intervene immediately. Since, I had no idea which “adult” he was there with, I had a talk with the child first. I told him not to do that to strange dogs, because it scares them and they might bite his nose off. He ignored me, and continued to get in dogs faces. So, I found his mother, and told her the same thing I’d just said to the kid. She said, “Oh, that’s OK. He likes dogs.” I told her, “It doesn’t matter how much he likes dogs. Some dogs don’t like kids.” Her snide response, “Then they shouldn’t here.” I have to admit, that made me mad, so I said/yelled, “This is a dog park! There’s an entire park outside of this fence for your kid to play in, take him out there. Or make him leave our dogs alone. If your kid gets his nose bitten off, it’s your fault for letting him to that to the dogs.”

Meanwhile, the boy finally took on the wrong dog, a Chihuahua, and got a very minor “warning nip” to his nose (one tiny puncture mark, and a little dot of blood). I think the dog showed a great deal of bite inhibition. Of course, the kid started crying, and his mother became incensed. She was screaming, “That dog should be put down,” and “It’s so irresponsible to bring a dangerous dog to a park.” Blah, blah, blah. Then she started saying she was going to sue. The Chi’s owner was so upset, she was crying and kept apologizing. Luckily, there were several rational people there, who had seen the incident and that he’d been annoying all the dogs. We came to the owner’s rescue, and told the mother she didn’t have a leg to stand on, several people told him to stop, but he kept getting in the dog’s faces. If she pressed charges, we’d all show up to testify on behalf of the dog and owner. That shut her down, then we also insisted she and her child leave the dog park and not come back. To top it off… it turned out they didn’t even have a dog. So why the he** were they in the dog park in the first place? As she huffed out, Mommy Dearest told us, “I brought my son here to play with some dogs. I didn’t think he’d be attacked.”

Those were two extreme examples of very bad dog park days I’ve experienced. For the most part, dog/kid interactions aren’t so dramatic. But I’ve been in many dog parks, and I’ve seen so many children assault dogs. I’ve seen them throw dirt, rocks, sticks, and other things at or on dogs. I’ve seen kids kick and hit dogs. I’ve seen them chase and grab at a frightened dog. I’ve seen kids yank tails, ears, or fur. The list goes on and on…

Most dogs are amazingly tolerant! When children assault them, which is how they feel, most dogs only walk away. I find that amazing; after all, very few of us would allow anyone, child or adult, to throw things at us, kick us, pull our hair, etc., without reacting in some way. Yet, we expect dogs to tolerate, even like, all those things. And, if they don’t… If they try to defend themselves by growling, snapping, or God forbid biting (no matter how slight), they’re bad dogs and they get punished, or even killed.

My dog is not your kid’s toy! Neither you, nor your child, get to decide you can pet or play with my dog… That is my decision! You, or your child, may ask; but, if I say no, that means NO. I don’t walk up and start touching you, or your children. So, unless I say it’s OK, no one should do that to my dog! Also, when I tell you to stop, that means STOP NOW! I know my dog, you don’t, and I know when he’s had enough!

Dog parks are for dogs! Most urban dogs have very few places where they can run around, off leash, and just be dogs. All urban children have lots of places to run around, and just be kids. So please, do everyone a big favor: Take your kids to kid parks, your dogs to dog parks, and don’t mix them up!!

For some great information about dog bite prevention and much more, check out the website: doggone safe.

What NOT to Take into a Dog Park… Part One

“A dog park is like a cocktail party, where you don't know anyone and everyone is drunk. You could have fun, but it could be a disaster.” Trish King.

In my occupation as a pet sitter, I spend a lot of time in dog parks; sadly, I’ve learned Trish King is absolutely right… This is part one of a series on what not to take into dog parks. In “My Three Rules for Dog Park Safety,” I said, “some people think it’s OK to bring ‘not dog friendly dogs’ to dog parks”; IT IS NOT OK. It’s extremely dangerous and very unfair for that dog, the other dogs, and their owners, to bring in a dog who doesn’t get along with other dogs! Just because it’s a dog park, doesn’t mean all dogs like to, or should be going to them!

Sadly, many dogs are not properly socialized as puppies. Many owners are warned to never allow their puppy to be around other dogs, or where they’ve been, until he’s had all his shots. So they never take the puppy out into public, or allow him to interact with any other dog until he’s met his entire vaccination schedule, which typically are finished at about sixteen weeks.

However, at approximately sixteen weeks is also when a puppy’s “socialization window” closes, and he starts to become fearful of unknown things. If he’s never had pleasant, or even benign, experiences with dogs, people, skateboards, car rides (don’t just take him to the vet and/or groomer), loud noises, etc., they will be unknown, and may become very scary things to him.

By no means, am I recommending that you take your puppy to a dog park to socialize him with other dogs. It is not a safe place for a young puppy! There is also a much higher potential of disease transmission in a dog park. Instead, take your puppy to some really good puppy classes, and set up ‘play dates’ with healthy, friendly dogs. Having friendly, well-socialized adult dog friends is a great way for your pup to learn how to play and interact properly with other dogs.

Let me start by saying, most dog “aggression,” is due to fear. We all feel fear; it’s a strong and important survival instinct. When we are extremely fearful, we will often either flee, or we will fight, and dogs will too. Also, just because we don’t think a person, or animal, should be afraid of something, doesn’t make their fear any less real or traumatic…

I’ve seen people literally drag a terrified dog into a dog park. It breaks my heart to watch the poor dog cowering, and trying to get away, while being overwhelmed by his greatest fear (other dogs). Then if he finally decides to defend himself by growling, barking, snapping, etc., often his “parent” will punish him for it. That makes me crazy, because I know it’ll probably make the problem worse. I often try to talk to the owners about it, and they usually say something like, “I know he’s scared of other dogs, but he has to get over it.”

Perhaps, but “flooding” a dog, who is terrified of dogs, by forcing him to interact with several at once, is not the way to do it… No matter what you’ve seen on TV. Yelling at, hitting, jerking, “alpha rolling,” or using shock collars on a fearful dog, just for trying to defend himself, won’t teach the dog to “like” other dogs; in fact it’ll probably have the complete opposite effect. He’s likely to not only become even more fearful of dogs, but also of his owner.

Like a person who is terrified of flying, large crowds, or whatever, many dogs can learn to overcome their fears, with the help of a well-trained, experienced behaviorist. While a dog may learn to tolerate, or even like other dogs, one on one, he may never feel comfortable in an enclosed space, filled with strange dogs… Which is the definition of a dog park.

Just as some kids aren’t cut out to be athletes, no matter how much their parents may want it, some dogs aren’t cut out to be “dog park” dogs, no matter how much their owners may want it. That doesn’t make them bad kids, or bad dogs… It just is!

My Three Rules for Dog Park Safety

“A dog park is like a cocktail party, where you don't know anyone and everyone is drunk. You could have fun, but it could be a disaster.” Trish King.

In my occupation, I spend a lot of time in dog parks, and I know Trish King is absolutely right. When I take Jesse and/or my clients to a dog park, my goal is to make it fun, happy and safe for the dogs and myself. So when we go to any dog park, even those we frequent often, I follow three rules:

One: Before we enter a dog park, I stop to evaluate the situation. I would rather avoid problems in the first place, and if I don’t like what I see we don’t go in. Here’s what I look for:

Are there too many dogs for the space? The more the merrier is not true of dog parks; too many dogs in too little space are recipes for disaster. If it’s too crowded, we go elsewhere. Then I ask myself three questions: 1. Are the dogs interacting well together? 2. Are the people paying attention to their dogs, instead of chatting with each other? 3. Are there young children in there? If the answers are: yes, yes, and no, we go in. If not, we don’t.

Two: Once we’re in the dog park, I watch my dog(s), and the dogs they’re interacting with. I make sure they’re not getting overly stimulated, tired, stressed, or annoyed. I want to distract or remove them before any of those things occur, which means I pay attention to them the entire time.

Also, I keep my dog(s) away from the entrance, that’s where problems happen first. Plus, I keep an eye out as dogs and people enter. Unfortunately, some people think it’s OK to bring “not dog friendly dogs” to dog parks, others think it’s OK to bring small children… neither is OK!

Three: Knowing when to leave the dog park is important. If things are going well, my rule of thumb is to stay no longer than 30 – 45 minutes. That’s a good amount of time for most dogs to play, exercise well, and do all their business, before getting too tired. An overly tired dog can be cranky and irrational, that’s when little quarrels or big fights can break out.

Even if we just got there, my cue to leave immediately is if a “not dog friendly dog,” or small children arrive. I’d rather not be there to see a dogfight, or a child being bitten. Been there, done that, don’t want to do it again! But that’s another blog…

Having had some very bad dog park experiences, I’ve learned to always follow my three rules…

1. If it looks unsafe, don’t go in

2. Pay attention while you’re there

3. Leave at the first sign of potential trouble

A few ways pet parents can help their pet sitter…

Last night I was up until after midnight, waiting for word that my clients returned home from their vacation. I was fairly confident they made it home, safe and sound. I imagined they were probably exhausted and just wanted to kiss their babies hello, and crawl into bed. But I didn’t know for sure. So I finally went to sleep a little worried… This morning there was an email saying they had gotten home later than they expected, but they were back and all was well. Such a relief!!

Things happen, flights get delayed, or cancelled. Cars break down, and there can be serious traffic jams on the way home. Pet parents are delayed getting home by a few hours, or much longer. In which case, I would happily to take care of the pets until their parents finally return. People are usually very good about contacting me if they are delayed, which I really appreciate! It gives me a heads up on what’s going on with them, and if I need to alter my plans. So if you’re delayed please let your pet sitter know as soon as possible. They will love you for it!

Most of the time, pet parents contact me, as soon as possible, when they get home. However, there have been a very few occasions when they forgot. It’s totally understandable, but I still worry. Please, do your pet sitter a big favor and try to always remember to let them know when you get home. BTW, that means when you are actually there, not just “back in town.” Our job isn’t complete until we know you are really at home. We pet sitters thank you so much for this!!

There are a few more things that would help to make your pet sitter’s life a little easier while you’re away. After all, a happy pet sitter makes for happier pets too…

Please make sure there is enough food, treats, medicines, kitty litter, etc., to last for the entire time you will be away. Your pet sitter really might not have the time to “run by the store.”

If there are any changes in your pet’s diet, medicines, health, routine, etc., please let your pet sitter know and leave written instructions. The same goes for household changes too. Also, if you happen to change the locks, don’t forget to provide us with a new key!

Always try to leave a landline contact number to wherever you will be staying, so we can reach you in case of an emergency. Cell phones don’t always work and, if your pet has an emergency, we may need to reach you immediately. Pet sitters try not to bother their clients, but if we have a question that really needs addressing, we usually need the answer then.

If you’re expecting anyone to be in your home, or on your property, while you’re away (housekeepers, groundskeepers, family members, roommates, etc.), please let your pet sitter know. It’s very scary to find someone you don’t know or expect, in the house when you arrive, or for him or her to walk in while you’re there! Part of our job is to care for your home and property. So it really helps to know who should, and shouldn’t, be there.

I thank you, on behalf of pet sitters everywhere, for remembering to help us out by doing these things!!